My Letter

I had to write a letter to the committee as to why they should pick us. I wanted to add it to the Blog so that it is apart of the documentation of this journey.

Here it is:

6/12/12

To whom it may concern:

My name is Karmann Wennerlind and I am writing on behalf of my husband and I concerning the IVF scholarship program through From INSIID the Heart foundation. I am thankful for the opportunity to write and share our story in hopes for a chance for help concerning our journey to be parents. I just recently was informed about this foundation by our doctor, Dr Sher, here in Las Vegas. I am truly touched that there are doctors who are willing to give their time, talents, and efforts to help couples in need who long to be parents who may not have the ability to do so on their own.

Ever since I was a little girl all I wanted to be was a mom. I grew up with a brother that was 5 years older than me so in my younger years I was alone. I would have all my dolls around me in front of the mirror to play with and I would pretend to be their mom. I envied large families and I wanted to have 10 kids when I grew up so that I could experience a large family. I have always loved working with children and started babysitting at the age of 11 and continued to work in daycares through high school and while I pursued my college education. I received my Bachelors Degree in Family and Child Development in 2002 and shortly after in May of 2003 married my husband at the age of 22. My husband had just recently gotten home from a mission for our church and was starting out with his Associates Degree. I started working in Early Intervention working with children with disabilities from birth to three while he was in school. I got pregnant without trying in March of 04 and miscarried at 5 weeks. We were both sad but realized that God had a plan and we went forward with pursuing education and work. My husband finished his Associates Degree and we moved from Salt Lake City to Las Vegas where he was to finish his degree in Education at UNLV. I got a job working for the state and after being there a few weeks was told I needed to get my Masters Degree in Special Education before I had been with the state for 3 years or I would be let go. My husband and I both were in school and working full time fall of 05-06. I enrolled in a fast Trac program and got my Masters Degree in Early Childhood Special Education and Autism in a year. After I finished school we decided we could start trying for a family. We started trying in October of 06 and I got pregnant in the beginning of July of 07 and miscarried for the second time at 5 weeks. The doctor told us to go ahead and try again right away. I got pregnant right away and miscarried again at 5 weeks at the end of Aug. I had blood work done and they told me I did not need a DNC. The doctor had no concerns and just told us to keep trying. In January of 08 my husband was offered an opportunity to take the fire sprinkler company he was working for while going to school and expand it into Phoenix, Arizona. He had the choice to take on this opportunity or go forward with his teaching degree We decided that it was a good opportunity to try and prepared to move in May of 2008 after my husband graduated with his Bachelors in Health Education.  We decided to stop trying for a family due to moving and wanting to be settled in Phoenix with work and insurance first before bringing a child into our home. I started working right away after we moved for an Early Intervention company and my husband attempted to start a company at the root of the fall of the economy. We had moved to Phoenix with over 400,000 dollars worth of work and lost it all with the economy within months of being in Arizona. While I worked,my husband worked hard as a one man show trying to build a company in a failing economy. I started down the path again of finding a doctor to help us get pregnant. I started in September of 08 with the first of many tests. Each test that I did ALWAYS came back NORMAL! My hormones were fine, I ovulated every month, my period was regular, and no one could ever find anything wrong. I started doing Acupuncture even though I am terrified of needles and seeing a chiropractor to help with my spine. I was willing to try anything to make this process work. I got pregnant in January of 09. I miscarried yet again at 5 weeks. My doctor at this time in Arizona told me that I needed to go and see a specialist. She ran some blood work to see if I have a folic acid deficiency. For the first time in all the tests that I did something came back abnormal. I was positive for MTHFR and I did not process folic acid correctly. My doctor prescribed me Folbic and I thought for sure this was the answer to my issues. I did not want to see a fertility specialist. I just kept thinking it will work itself out. I got pregnant again in February and miscarried again at 5 weeks. I still remained stubborn and tried again. I got pregnant in April of 09 and miscarried yet again at 5 weeks and again in May of 09 at 5 weeks. After being emotionally broken and so distraught that I had put my body through so much I called the Fertility Specialist. I let her know that we did not have a lot of money and asked if there was any way that we could do most of the tests coded so that my insurance would cover it. The doctor helped so much with doing most of the fertility tests that were needed coding them so that my insurance would cover. I started with the long list of tests. After each test was done the same answer would be told to me. Everything looks NORMAL!!! The doctor suggests that we need to go forward and do the lesser fertility treatment, IUI. I was put on Clomid which I was really unsure why since I didn’t have any trouble ovulating but went along with her treatment plan. In July of 09 I got pregnant with the IUI treatment and miscarried yet again at 5 weeks. The doctor wanted to do a laparoscopy surgery to see if I had Endometriosis in September of 09. We went forward with the process of scheduling it and my insurance denied the surgery. We met with her the beginning of September of 09 and her next proposal was for my husband and I to go forward with IVF. She then asked us how we would like to pay her the 10,000. My husband politely said we were done here and grabbed my hand and we walked out to never go back.

I felt that we needed a break. It had been such a long year of emotional up and downs. I was so tired and so frustrated. A few weeks later my husband came to me with the feelings he wanted to shut down the company he had worked so hard to build. The company that he branched off from in Vegas was struggling so bad and was taking the money that he had worked so hard to get to help keep them afloat. He could see that unless he completely broke off and did his own company he would never be able to go forward and make a living. My husband decided that he did not want to do fire sprinklers for the rest of his life and wanted to go back to the original plan of teaching. We felt the need to move up to Seattle where he was from so that he could go to school there and we could be close to family for the first time in our 6 years of marriage. We closed down the company in December of 09 and moved January of 10 to Seattle Washington. I was able to find a job right away in Early Intervention and began providing for our family while my husband looked for a substitute job in the schools and to enroll in school to get his Masters Degree. In January of 10 we were presented the opportunity to adopt a little boy. One of the families that I grew up with had a daughter who got pregnant without being married and wanted to give the baby up for adoption. My husband and I started the process of applying for LDS services right away to be ready for the baby in May of 2010. The mother kept in contact with us and told us she was deciding between us and another family. The end of February 2010 she called me to let me know that she felt that the baby was not ours and had chosen to give the baby to the other family. Devastated is an understatement upon hearing those words and that yet again our dreams of becoming parents were taken away. We continued to go forward in faith that there was a plan for us and a plan to be parents. A few days later my husband’s Aunt came to visit and upon talking with her she mentioned that maybe I should look into going Gluten and Wheat free since there is a correlation in Celiac Disease and infertility. I had struggled with horrible stomach problems since I was a baby and the way she described the symptoms it definitely sounded like me. She advised me to just try eating Gluten Free and see how I felt. I felt a noticeable difference in just a few days. After a month of not eating gluten and wheat my Mother in law had Wheat Thins on the counter and I ate 10. Within 20 minutes I was in so much pain and all the symptoms that I had all my life came back but more intense. At that point I knew that I had a problem and that I needed to not eat any Gluten or Wheat. In March of 2010 I saw an allergist and he confirmed my gluten and wheat intolerance and I am have currently been Gluten Free now for over 2 years. My insurance started in July of 2010 and my husband and I decided it was time to go down the dreaded road of doctors to try again to have a family. My mother in law told me of a doctor that she went to with my husband’s youngest brother and how she helped her with her hormones. I made the appointment and saw her for the first time in September of 2010. She looked over my records and told me that I had done all the tests that she would have me do and questioned the route the fertility specialist had gone due to us being able to get pregnant. She told me that her daughter had the same issue of multiple miscarriages and had started seeing one of her dear co-workers for help. She told me she would get in contact with this doctor and have him send a protocol of things to test and would get back to me. I ended up sending my blood to California to check for elevated Natural Killer Cells and to see if my husband and I shared any DQ-ALPHA Genotypes. In November of 2010 I finally had answers. She called me the night before Thanksgiving to tell me that I had elevated Natural Killer cells and my husband and I shared 2 DQ-ALPHA Genotypes. We both cried on the phone as for the first time in almost 4 years I had answers! I then got in touch with Dr. Cohen over the phone as his office is in Texas and he explained my problem. He was willing to have my doctor in Seattle, his friend, carry out the protocol that he did with his patients so that I didn’t have to travel to Texas. He told me my hormones were extremely low for my body weight and wanted me on high doses of hormones. He also wanted the doctor to do hysteroscopy due to him seeing left over miscarriage still left in my uterus from the ultrasound that the doctor had done in June of 09. After the hysteroscopy I was then to do my first Interlipid Infusion to bring down the Natural Killer cells and try for a baby.  In March of 2010 my lining was perfect, I had a good size egg, and I had done the infusion before ovulating. My doctor thought for sure that this would end up in a baby. In our disappointment it did not work. I did not get pregnant. Before we began to start the process again to do the treatments we were faced with another decision.  My husband after 18 months of trying to find work in the field of education with no success and no success in getting into school asked if I could see if I could get my job back in Vegas. We would move there for him to go back to school at UNLV and get his Masters in Special Education emphasizing in Secondary Education. I at first did not want to move!! I finally had a doctor that listened to me and was working with me. I did not want to leave that in hopes that finally we could have a baby. After lots of prayers and thoughts we decided the best option was to go forward and move. We needed to yet again go forward in faith that I would find the right doctor in Vegas and hope that my husband could find a job in the field of education and do well in school. In the long run I want to be a stay at home mom and I will not be able to do that unless my husband has a job that can take care of us. He had been in a rut for the past year and a half working as a valet attendant at a nice hotel in Seattle. He wanted to do more with his life. He wanted to have a career that he could provide for his family. It was time for him to go forward in his career and he was so excited. We moved to Vegas in July of 2011. I began again working for Early Intervention Services amongst my dear friends I had left 3 years previous. My insurance didn’t start till October of 2011 so I wasn’t able to see a doctor till November. I saw a regular OB who sent me to a specialist. I had to wait to see the specialist till January of 2012. The specialist had NO idea what to do with me and did not believe in the Natural Killer Cells. He did however want to help me and he recommended me to a fertility specialist in town that he knew. I went and saw him in the end of Feb. and never went back. He told me the findings that I had found in Seattle were not medically valid and that there was no evidence that it is a true problem. He did however tell me that if I did all the tests again in his facility he would try to guarantee me to have a baby. He wanted me to do ALL the tests that I had already done and paid for again because he wanted to be the one to do the tests! I was floored! I had already spent so much money over the past 5 years and the thought to spend it all over again for tests that wouldn’t change so that he could be the one to do the tests made me so angry. I politely listened to the nurse go through the process and I walked out to never return. Yet again in despair of what to do and wondering if I would ever find a doctor who could help me reach my dream of being a mom I came across the SHER institute. The beginning of March I took my stack of 300 pages of medical records and walked into the office. While holding back tears I asked the receptionist if the doctor here believed in Natural Killer Cells and asked if he could help someone like me who has endured 8 miscarriages help me to be a mom. She smiled and told me I had come to the right place. She told me he had a cancelation today and could see me later that afternoon. I went and did a few appointments for work and then returned and met with Dr. Sher. He didn’t even look over my records and just knowing that I had had 8 miscarriages each time at 5 weeks he knew right away I had too many Natural Killer cells and guessed that my husband shared a DQ ALPHA genotype. He sat with me and explained everything in detail with me and why after almost 3 years I had not been pregnant after being able to get pregnant back to back. He then explained to me that my BEST option for having a baby would be IVF. I began crying as I knew that the reality of that option would weigh a heavy toll on my husband and I. Dr. Sher walked me through the financial process and the option of doing 2 cycles for cheaper. He also informed us of a payment option through a bank that he worked through. I left the office feeling such peace. I went home and shared the information over with my husband. I could tell the news weighed so heavy on him. He went through the emotions of anger, hurt, worry, and frustration. The reality of paying 17,000 dollars for the 2 cycle IVF plan along with having to do the Interlipid infusions and medication for the IVF was heart wrenching. He explained that we don’t have the money to pay for it. We both come from humble family situations and we dont have family to turn to for help. My father has been in and out of work my whole life. I learned how to work at a young age and pay for things on my own. My husband’s father is a plumber and with the recent downfall of the economy he has been in and out of work as well. We are currently paying for my husband to get his Masters Degree. I have a good job that provides for our needs but we don’t have a ton of extra money lying around. Ryan had a fulltime substitute job that started in December 2011 in the self-contained classroom but we do not know if he has the job next year. We are hoping he will get hired for a Resource position for the 2012-2013 school year but we will not know till later this month or July.  We have moved a lot over the past 5 years and it has taken a toll on our savings. We try to live within our means and we only have a few thousand dollars in debt on our credit cards. Both of our cars are bought and paid for and the only big loans that we have are our school loans. We try to pay for cash with everything that we buy to not get into debt. We both have chosen careers that reward us in many ways but the reality of it is our careers don’t allow us to have lots of extra money in the bank to pay for something like IVF. I am going to be 32 years old in just a few months. We have been married 9 years now. All I ever wanted to be was a mom. My heart aches every time I hear that one of my friends or family members are expecting. I show nothing but love and support for their happiness but it doesn’t stop the hurt that I have with not being able to go down that road.  It hurts even more that the reality of our situation is we cannot get pregnant without doing IVF and interlipid infusions and we really don’t have the financial ability unless we take a loan from the bank. When Dr. Sher told us about the opportunity to apply for the IVF scholarship I was overwhelmed with gratitude and tears. Although I know that there are many other couples who are in the same situation as we are and the chance of us being picked is low the thought of maybe a chance to be picked was enough to give me HOPE. In this life HOPE is everything. As long as we have HOPE we can continue to go forward. Hope is what has helped me continue to pick myself up and keep going forward after every miscarriage and let down. The HOPE to be parents someday is very strong inside of us and we pray every day that one day it can happen. Thank you so very much for taking the time to read over our story. Thank you so much for this opportunity.

Deepest regards,

Karmann and Karl Ryan Wennerlind